162.1 million users on tumblr and i still can’t even get 20 notes on a text post
*on the phone with police after reporting a murder* no you hang up first
"hello 911 i’d like to report a murder in th-" "haha, wow you’re a little snitch. hold on a sec. HEY DAVE, CHECK OUT THIS FUCKIN SNITCH ON LINE THREE"
Me smoking my future kid’s shitty weed when I confiscate it
- What girls say: I'm fine
- What girls mean: I'm too embarrassed to ask for water from your mom because this is the first time I've been over and she's asked me like 500 times if I wanted any and I've been saying no but I'm dying of thirst
kissing is great
but wow when you get to kiss someone you have feelings for and you’ve wanted to kiss them for the longest time and you get to stroke their face and you’re so aware of their body and how nice their lips feel
do all american high school parties actually have those red plastic cups or is this a lie created by the movies
My boyfriend. He asked if I was off my period and this is how he indirectly described it..